i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Please, let me fuck your mom
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
You can't motorboat a personality
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Randomize
