do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
You took a bar mat shot.
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Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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