The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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