what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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