I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I want to be your penis for a week.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
