you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
