Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
