I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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