Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
