why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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