we have pet lesbian snakes
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
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