I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
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