Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize
