and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
