I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize