he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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