he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
