i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
