Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
