On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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