a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
