dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room