Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize