dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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