just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
