he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
