my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Randomize