I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize