You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
