Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
