i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
