dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
