So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize
