Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
