i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
