can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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