69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize