Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
