How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Randomize
