living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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