I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize