brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize