I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize