I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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