idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
