Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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