Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
that is very illegal...i love you.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
