i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
it's like iHOP with fire
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Randomize
