belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I'm so fucking centered right now
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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