hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
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she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
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My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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