We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Randomize
